Archive for January, 2009

15 Things I learned in 2008

15 things that I learned in 2008

1: I AM NOT WITHOUT PREJUDICE
I think that Mormons are insane. At first i thought that Mormons were nice people, then i realized that they’re actually evil, and then i realized that they did not realize that they were evil and that i was wrong and that they’re just insane, not evil. They don’t realize that they’re hypocrites and that even their actions lie. Nonetheless, i try to be nice to them, even though they totally screw me over whenever they can.

2: STEWIE GRIFFIN IS GAY
No joke, i did not realize that my favorite trigger happy, matricidal, world dominating, super genius one year old was gay. I think i kind of just ignored the comments about how Brian’s son was handsome and muscular, and other such incredibly blatant hints.

3: SOUTH AFRICAN MUSIC ROCKS
Clegg, Savuka and Juluka, December African Rain, Ozuani Obulele, Asimbonanga, i could really go on and on.

4:MONGOLIAN FOOD ROCKS:
I really don’t have much to say about how much i love Mongolian food without sounding like an idiot.

5: I HAVE A LOVE/HATE RELATIONSHIP WITH TWILIGHT.
Great story, could be a lot better, especially if she ditched the annoying moral underpinnings and just told the damn story without a million adverbs or used the word marble about one hundred times less.

6: PEOPLE LIE, NO EXCEPTIONS, YES EVEN I
I got this one from House, and it is SO true.

7: I AM NOT A FRIEND, I AM A BURDEN
I realize that i am very needy and annoying and that tends to make most people avoid me, especially the ones i really care about, luckily, i have made new friends who actually like me and get my jokes and enjoy hiking at three AM in the morning after having coffee, and watching too much reality TV.

8: HUGH JACKMAN IS INDEED, THE SEXIEST MAN ALIVE
SEXY just plain sexy.

9: ITS INCREDIBLY EASY TO GAIN TWENTY POUNDS IN HALF A YEAR, AND ITS A BITCH TO LOOSE IT.
I went from 176 lbs to 195 lbs in six months and its taken me five months to get down to 187 lbs. And no, loosing weight is not a New Year’s Resolution.

10: THIS PAPER WILL BE LARGELY IGNORED BY WHOEVER SEES IT
Its true, if you actually made it this far, i am amazed.

11: I WANT TO RULE THE WORLD, BUT WOULD CONTENT IF I COULD JUST BE LEFT THE FUCK ALONE WITH MY BOOKS AND PAPER IN A DARK AND WARM PLACE.
I think i would be happy if i got to live in an old forgotten basement with unlimited storage capacity for my books and a limitless stream of music, where i can spend the rest of my life in study and meditation. Actually i don’t really want to rule the world anymore, i just want comfort, but i will try if the opportunity arises.

12: DON’T MISTAKE TEMPTATION FOR OPORTUNITY
I read it in a fortune cookie and i though i should add it in here just for the heck of it.

13: I AM NOT AS ARROGANT AS I THOUGH I WAS
I’m actually a nice, if annoying person. And more and more, i recognize that there are people smarter than me. I will of course, deny this later. I am after all a genius.

14: MY DAD AND I HAVE SERIOUS CULTURAL DIFFERENCES.
Yeah, he’s a Mexican living in America, I’m a Mexican living in America. Does not sound like much of a difference, but trust me, it makes for awesome fights on trivial things, like writing as a career or going to London to study dead people.

15: LIFE IS WONDERFULLY IRONIC. AND I LOVE IT, DESPITE THE SUCKINESS.
Really it is. If there is such a thing as God, then he has a deliciously evil and twisted sense of humor, we would get along perfectly. Not that I’m evil, i just have a twisted sense of humor.

16: I ACTUALLY DO WANT TO GET MARRIED.
I was under the impression that marriage is something i would never want, but after seeing Ellen and Portia’s wedding (not in person, alas), i kind decided i do want that, even if i have to move to London or Massachusetts or somewhere.

17: ANGELS ARE ACTUALLY PRETTY COOL
at least Supernatural Season 4 angels.

18: I LIED, I SAID 15, I HAVE 20. I ROCK

19: I MAY DISLIKE MY FAMILY MORE NOW THAT I DON’T ACTUALLY LIVE WITH THEM, THAN WHEN I DID.
My brother is moody, my dad is even moodier, and my mom does not shut up and rants about the same thing over and over again, Much like me.

20: NICOLE KIDMAN IS MY FAVORITE ACTRESS. AND FREDDIE HIGHMORE IS MY FAVORITE ACTOR.
I realized this after Jennifer Aniston, Julia Roberts, and yes, even Angeline Jolie. and yes i realize that Freddie Highmore is a child actor, but he’s a good actor. and good is good. even though Matt Damon could probably kick his ass off the favorite actor label. and Hugh Jackman, cause he’s hot, and Highmore is not.

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